kyo doko e ikimashita ka?

We went lots of places today! Sky took the day off and we went to get his prescriptions first and then went to the post office to mail Kimmie's box. Then after we got the stuff we needed to get done we went to Borders and got "Japanese for fun" (Don't worry Danielle, I have you covered) and we looked for "Japanese Fundamentals" but I didn't remember what it was called and I didn't see it so we just ended up ordering it online instead. After Borders we went to the Desert Sky mall to Steve and Barry's where I got a really nice winter coat for $15!! I also got a long sleeve shirt and some fuzzy socks from there. Then we went to Rave and got me a really cute black shirt dress for $16.50, a pair of leggings with lace at the bottom, a gray tank top and three scoop neck shirts in gray, brown, and green. At the mall we spent a total of $100! Did I mention Sky's two pairs of jeans and three long sleeve shirts. We did very well! So if you're in AZ go check out Steve and Barry's at the Desert Sky mall.

Yesterday we went to Barnes & Nobles and got a Japanese compact dictionary. So I think we're pretty good on the resource front until we get there and I enroll in a Japanese college course because then I'll have the text book and hopefully a workbook as well. Maybe we will get two so Sky can have a workbook too. Eventually I want to get a strictly kanji book though.

I'm such a lucky woman. I have a wonderful husband who spoils me, a fantastic family who also spoils me, some of the most amazing friends you could ever ask for who... you guessed it... spoil me! :) Bottom line, I'm effen spoiled and loving it! Seriously, life is amazing. I really just need to get my license, get braces, and get enrolled and school and I will be set. I will post some pictures when all of my other stuff arrives too so make sure and check back!

Great... just effen great

Grrr! I just made lodging reservations and they don't have any pet friendly rooms. Then the guy scared me and said he couldn't give me a house because we don't have children so I was freaking out but then he said there were some regular rooms available. So now we just have to figure out the dog situation. I don't want to be away from them because they aren't coming with us and I would really like to spend as much time with them as possible. It makes me so sad that they're not coming with us. I mean, I know they will probably be a whole lot happier there because my in-laws have a large backyard and they'll have another playmate as well. And Bella is going to get loads of human attention, I mean, she does anyway but she is just in love with Sky's dad. So that will be nice for her. :(

On a not so sad note I found out that my foottraffic.com order had gotten declined because I entered the wrong address so I took the opportunity to get the red, white, and black argyle ones instead of two of the black, white, and gray ones. So I'm excited about that.

I just can't wait until everything is taken care of here and we're on our way out. I am going to miss everyone but I am just so excited to go to Japan and see it through new eyes. Hopefully I will be able to come back with conversational skills if not fluent! I've been studying, so I guess I better get some stuff here done so that I can study some more.

I'm so excited!!!

I'm talking to Danielle right now on webcam!!! :) Yay!!! I just missed Gary though, and that sucks. But I'll see them both rather soon! :) YAY!!

Also I got some awesome over the knee socks and some awesome shoes!!! I got two pairs of black, gray, and white argyle over the knee socks and one pair of plain black over the knee socks. They are adorable!!!
Then I got some super sweet boots. They are black sort of slouchy with buckles and have no heel so they should be pretty comfortable. So that's pretty awesome. I also got some shoes that are knockoffs of the ones that Carrie wears almost the entire Sex and the City movie. They're sort of gladiator style but not the really ugly ones. I am not really into the whole gladiator thing but these I had to have.

Seriously! Aren't they just fantastic?? I love them. I can't wait until they get here. I got all sorts of girly recently. I fully blame Danielle!!! lol Not that its a bad thing, I just don't typically do this whole thing. You can typically find me bumming around in PJ pants and a tank top like I am right now. But I'm becoming a different person. I am now a wife and in then next ten years I will be a mother. I hope to become more sophisticated but still "trendy" (for lack of a better word). Well, just wanted to brag about my awesome finds! Stay tuned because when they get here I will be posting pictures of me in them!

Yay!!

So today Sky and I got up pretty early and went out and ate at Nakama. Honestly I was pretty disappointed. The place is ridiculously trendy. The sushi selection was small and EVERYTHING came with California rolls which is NOT sushi. The teriyaki chicken pretty good but that was pretty much the only good thing. The miso and the iced green tea were not good. To make matters worse our waiter was a douche and so was this guy who sat next to us. Sky was wearing his Speaker City shirt (Old School) and the guy said, "Hey bro, do you work at Speaker City?" I wanted to laugh really hard but Sky was really nice about it, and then the dude was kind of a jerk to him. But oh well, I'll be in Japan eating awesome sushi in like two months!!! I'm so excited. Danielle just put up some pictures and I just want to be there already! But I'm glad we won't go until November because I get the opportunity to see my parents and all our family before we leave.

Anyway we got a ton of cleaning done today. I feel really good about that. I have our guest room full of stuff that really needs to be gone through and I'll have to vacuum, sweep, and mop tomorrow and our house is looking good! :) Yay!

Well, I'm really hungry again so I'm going to eat and then maybe we'll watch a movie. Ja mata!

I'M FINISHED!!!!!!

I finally finished my grandparent's 50th wedding anniversary scrapbook!!! YAY!!! I'm so proud of myself. I feel accomplished. So I can bring it with us when we got through Texas and actually give it to them then. :) So happy!! Just wanted to share.

I'm so worn out

I have so much to do with the house but I've just been so exhausted and feeling crappy these past few days. I got a bit done today but not enough for me to feel accomplished or for it to even show because my house is a MESS. Seriously. Its bad. It upsets me.

I ended up ordering Sky's poker chips which were more expensive than I'd care to admit. It was mostly shipping that made it so expensive. It is insane how much prices on somethings have gone up. That's one thing I'm not looking forward to in Japan. Food prices are supposed to be worse there, especially on non perishables so I'm probably going to ship myself some boxes of stuff.

Danielle is in Japan now. Speaking of Danielle and Japan, she got me totally addicted to "Dreamworld." I have been listening to it all day. I really need to buy that CD. Ah... I guess its time to get myself fed and do something productive... :s

Today

Because I can't think of a more interesting title today. :s

I got a ton of pages done in the scrapbook. I'm so close to being done I can taste it! Finally walgreens.com quit acting up and I was able to order my pictures so hopefully by the end of next week I'll be done with it! I'm excited.

I took pictures of all of my expensive purses, wallets, and shoes for the house inventory. Still working on documenting everything else. The house is such a mess right now but I've been feeling pretty crappy today. It may have been because I only ate once. I was too busy thinking about other stuff! Bad, I know.

I ordered part of Sky's anniversary present today and when he gets home from playing poker I'm going to let him pick the chip set that he's going to get. I have a few in mind, I hope he likes one. He can be pretty picky sometimes. I cannot believe we have been married for almost two years. On one hand it feels way shorter but on the other it feels way longer, does that make any sense? Our marriage has seemed shorter but with everything that has happened with everyone else that period of time has felt a lot longer. So we've been married for two years and together for almost four. It will be four in April. I can't believe how much has happened in this time.

Lets see... I've witnessed seven marriages. One divorce. Three broken off engagements (if you can really count any of those). Two people joining the military. Four pregnancies. Five failed friendships, and if you count all the ones between her and myself it would be seven. There might be an engagement that actually makes it to marriage here soon too if he does it on their anniversary!

As crappy as some of the things that happened were I am really happy right now. There are a few things that can be better and those are things that I am working on within myself. I wish that Kimmie was able to try for Japan but it isn't practical or what is best for her family and that sucks, but I am happy that they are smart enough to make the decisions that are best for them.

Wow, this turned out longer than I thought. One more thing, Gary has already arrived in Japan and Danielle is en route and should be arriving in a few hours. She should be updating her blog when she gets the chance and if she doesn't get to when she arrives I will post as soon as I hear from her. Check back soon. :)

Sad face!!!

I just said bye to Danielle and now I'm crying. I'm going to see her soon but she was crying so I just couldn't help it as soon as I got inside. :( Aww!! I'm going to miss her!! She and Gary are such good friends, I have no idea what I would do without them. I'm so glad they get to see each other very soon. I miss you already Danielle and you aren't even gone yet. Have a safe trip and I'll see you soon. Love you! And try not to stress on the way there.

I'm such a loser...

I can't do it. I've already backed out. I'm really not ready. I feel like my whole body has been wanting to shut down. I've been really shaky and feeling like I need to vomit. I've been getting headaches. I just think it would be better for me to practice more and then do it. I don't want to put too much pressure on myself and I think only driving pretty regularly for a week and then going to take my test would be a little too much. I feel like such a failure. I know that I really shouldn't but I can't help it... Lets just hope I can use my mom's car and get used to that pretty soon. I really need to get this done but I don't want to make it too hard on myself. Hope for me! Sorry to disappoint.

So very, very tired

Meh... I'm exhausted! Yesterday we finally finished getting Danielle's stuff all tagged and ready to be moved, made color keys for the moms... etc. We get back to my house and have to wait for her laundry to get dried so we can fold it. She falls asleep, I stay up because if I wouldn't have I would never have gotten back up. I talk to Kimmie in the meantime because I didn't get to talk to her yesterday morning. So her laundry gets done and I fold it and she starts to wake up. I hear Sasha in the bedroom whining so I tell Danielle to get prepared so I can let the girls out. It was midnight. I start toward my bedroom which is at the back of the house with my sleeping husband in it and notice that the light is on. Then it hits me... the smell. I open the door to see Sky (hubby) standing in front of Sasha's kennel looking really tired and offended and Sasha sitting there, ears back, tail tucked between her legs looking very sad. The smell is excruciating, poor thing had the runs. It was like everywhere in the bottom of her kennel.

Sasha is not a small dog so we stand there deliberating, trying to figure out how to get her from the kennel to the bathroom without getting crap everywhere. We decided we needed to pick her up... yeah, not fun. We finally get her to the shower and I hop in there in a bikini and wash the poor thing up. When she was finished I still needed to shower so thankfully Danielle was over. She came and got Sasha and dried her off and hung out with her while I finished showering. This whole time Bella is whining incessantly and being incredibly annoying. When I got finished showering I went in to the computer room to see how my baby is doing and Danielle informs me that she tried to take Sasha out and she walked around the whole yard in pooping form but couldn't get anything out. My poor baby. I decided to stay up with her all night. Danielle stayed till about 2 and Sasha seemed alright. She only looked uncomfortable when she tried to use the potty and nothing came out, so I decided to just have her kennel out in the living room and sleep on the couch. She then woke me up every hour on the hour to let her out where she would to the poop-stance-walk thing for a few minutes before giving up and coming inside. I finally got a little bit of sleep and then woke up to call the vet to see if we could get Sasha an appointment. Right as I was getting the number Sky came in and said Sasha had a 9am appointment. So I got ready to go and we took her. We really need pet insurance. :s

Well we got back from the vet and I decided to make her some food and then take a nap, she finally went again but it was still not normal. I took a sample that we need to take back to the vet but other than that she seems alright. I think it might have been the fact that Sky gave her some of the new food without any mix of the other and her body just wasn't used to it. Lets hope so though, I guess its not uncommon for GSDs to be prone to intestinal infections. I hope its nothing like that. I just want her to start feeling better. So now even though I really just want to sleep for like a week I guess I'm going to start cleaning and organizing my house so I don't have to cram when it comes time to go. Lets hope I make some progress... I can barely thing right now.

Well... that was awkward

Today was the court hearing for Chris. I went and testified and saw her. I really don't want [him] to get taken away from her, I just want what's best for [him]. I don't think her head is in the right place at all. I wish people would stop thinking this was about anything other than [him]. I hope I did the right thing, and I do feel that I did. I mean, what could she possibly have expected? She lied and said she didn't live with those two idiots. I hope that doesn't come back to bite her in the ass, but I don't know.
*
In other news, Danielle and I went to Gary's mom's house and finished!!! She's like practically all set. With the exception of the random DVD we found in the neon. So we feel accomplished. I've pretty much decided to just try and go for it and take my driving test on Wednesday morning. I drove quite a bit today and did fairly well. I think I'll be okay. I'm relatively confident! I know that sounds bad but I can't really help but be nervous considering I've really only been driving for like a week! We shall see. Check back for updates! Especially on Wednesday!

Wooohooo!!!

OUR EXTENSION GOT APPROVED!!! Thank flippin goodness! I was beginning to freak out. Danielle is on her way back, she's about 45 minutes out or so. She's going to head home and drop some stuff off and then she and I are going to get together and she's going to show me out where she took her driving test so I can know what to expect. Hopefully I can take (and hopefully pass!) it by the end of the week. I'm a huge bundle of emotions right now.

Soooo.... We bought our plane tickets for Colorado. We'll be there on November 16th. Our plan is to leave here on November 1st and drive to Texas and see a friend of mine and family, then drive on to Florida probably stopping in Mississippi for a night before we arrive.

I'm looking into getting Rosetta Stone (possibly) to start learning Japanese but I just was referred to a site that is supposed to be a similar program. I'm going to give that a whirl so we shall see where things go. Well, I'm going to try and figure this site out and then get ready to head out with Danielle. Ja mata!

I'm so proud of myself

I drove again today. I went all through the operational area over the bridge out the north gate and to my parents house!!! I feel really accomplished! The only places that I really got nervous was initially leaving base, the turn on Northern, and then the turn into my parents housing area. The turn on Northern really only made me nervous because there was some jerk behind me who was honking for me to go even though there was oncoming traffic and no arrow and I was like eff that! Then he was tailing me practically the whole way down Northern. But I didn't really let it get to me because I felt like I was doing really well.

Hubby even said that if he were grading me and I didn't ask all the questions that I asked he would have passed me. I think I'm ready to take the test if I don't have to be on Bell or Grand. Danielle said she didn't have to go on either of those, just in the housing area behind the DMV. I just need to practice three point turns a little more and I think I should be good. I'll probably try to get out on busier roads before I take the test but I really need to take this thing soon! I'm excited and nervous! Wish me luck and stay tuned!

!!!

Yesterday was pretty good. Started off as usual. Danielle came by to do some laundry before she went to Nevada with her family. She got her head sat on by Sasha. I laughed hysterically for a good five minutes. I drove the Neon around housing and wasn't freaking out. I went out with hubby later and drove further too. I even parallel parked! I'm proud of myself. I can't wait until I get off work today so I can go out again. I really hope I get my license before we leave. I guess I'll just learn to drive a stick shift after that.

Last night I also made some ridiculously awesome brownies. I think that's pretty much it for now, I will probably pose again after today's driving excursion.

I feel like pulling all my hair out!!!

I'm so frustrated!!! I'm really starting to lose my cool. I feel like I'm about to have a nervous breakdown!! There is so much to do and so little time. Not only do I have this driving thing to worry about which is pretty much my number one priority, but I have the house, the studying, and the scrapbooks. It doesn't help that I'm like wicked broke...

I'm so nervous. Like I've been in a constant state of wanting to puke just because there is so much going on. Oh, and to make matters worse our extension hasn't even been approved yet and we don't even have orders yet! So we may not even be able to do all of the traveling we want prior to going. I just want to scream. I really should have quit earlier but I couldn't bring myself to do that if we didn't know anything. Thankfully I only have two more days after today. I mean, I know my job doesn't take up a ton of time but it takes up enough.

There's so much we need to do and I'm just terrified things aren't going to work out the way I want them to. Up until now I think I've been pretty calm but I'm really starting to flip out. I need a nice hot bubble bath and a massage.

Kimmie, Danielle, and I

My day started off as usual, except I was ridiculously tired and slept in until eight. Then I got up and called Kimmie. I got to see the baby on webcam and she's huge now!! And still ridiculously adorable. Then I logged into work and Danielle came over. When I got off we clipped Sasha's nails because she jumped to love on Danielle and scratched her really hard and broke the skin. After that we went back to Danielle's to pack up the majority of the stuff that needed to be transported to Gary's mom's so it can get moved. Then we took it to Gary's mom's. From there we went back to Danielle's to wait for her mom and then hit the mall.

When we got to the mall we went to Forever 21 and got a couple layering tees and camis. I then went and got my Halloween kitty from build-a-bear that Desiree bought for me. I named it "Boo Boo Kitty Fuck" and it highly amused me. I will update with pictures tomorrow.

But that's pretty much been my day today. I will update tomorrow. Ja mata!

Grr...

Today started off alright and as usual with me calling Kimmie and talking to her a while. Danielle and I were supposed to go to the Lush store in Scottsdale but her day started off pretty poorly so we didn't end up doing that. We just kind of hung out. Hubby and I went over to my parents house for dinner tonight and that was pretty good. I ended up being really upset on the way home though. I mean, I'm stoked about going to Japan but now I'm scared to death. I'm pretty useless on my own, or at least I feel that way. I don't have my license yet and its pretty embarrassing but honestly I'm terrified of driving. Other people are so idiotic on the road its unbelievable. Its incredibly surprising that 3/4 of the people on the road even have licenses... or maybe they don't but either way they are on the road and its scary. I would feel more comfortable if I had more practice but I'm such a noob! It just scares me to be in control of a massive heap of steel that is capable of traveling at high speeds. I don't think its irrational considering the amount of accidents I have been in, but I just wish I could get over it somehow... I just don't know how. It doesn't help that I get pressure from a lot of people... I don't know. I'm just really upset right now. I wish I could find some way for me to just relax... I really hope that this plan that I have works and I'm able to get my license before Japan. Its possible I just wonder how probable it is. If I don't get my license here I'm stuck without it for another three years... and while that is a little relieving it is also extremely unnerving. We shall see. Stay tuned...

Today...

Was relatively uneventful. I talked to Kimmie in the morning as usual. Then got "ready" to "go" to work. Had some problems logging on and ended up only working for like three hours today but I guess I'm supposed to get paid for my other time since I was on the line with a tech. Danielle came over right before I got off work to hang out and talk and do some laundry. Then Sasha had to go and mess up our plans by throwing up so we had to take her to the vet. She's okay, we just wanted to make sure. Then we finally got Bella her new kennel today and its huge! Even Sasha can fit in it.

Then we came home and made cookies from scratch! I put together my thank you baskets for the people here that worked on my clearance even though it was them just doing their jobs I'm incredibly grateful. I guess we'll drop those off tomorrow before heading to Scottsdale to go to Lush. I'm incredibly tired so I'm going to go pass out.

I feel accomplished

Today was a great and fairly productive day. I slept in till eight and called Kimmie like normal. Then I called the overseas clearance office who then told me I was approved. I called everyone freaking out and screaming. Danielle and I had already planned to try and get her move taken care of as well as go to Mesa for her phone issues. She came over around nine-thirty and we went to TMO and they got her paperwork done. We then picked up my paperwork from the overseas clearance office and took them to hubby so he could turn them in to get the ball rolling with everything else. On the drive to Mesa I called the office that was holding Danielle's passport hostage and found out they actually did finally start working on her flights so she should hopefully have that information tomorrow morning.

We got to Mesa and went and dropped her phone off and then saw puppies at the Animal Kingdom then went to Papaya and Charlotte Russe. We actually made it out of the mall spending under $20!! We were so proud. We then went back to my house and hung out until her brother got off work. Then when we went to get him we stopped at Target and only spent around $20 also. We stopped at New Tokyo Japanese market on the way to pick up her brother and I surprisingly enough only spent $5!!! So even though I spend more than I should have I spent WAY less than I could have. So I am proud of myself. And now I'm hungry. So I will eat and then head to bed relatively shortly. Sayonara!

I GOT APPROVED!!!

Japan here I come!!!! Again... I'm so excited! I have been freaking out all day. I just cannot wait! Now just to get out furniture moving in order and buy our plane tickets to Colorado and things are good! We just need to find out our date to actually fly out and our port and plan accordingly. Danielle's process is starting to fall into place and she should be in Japan within ten or so days. We cannot wait!

Another day in my world

After work today I did end up meeting up with Chris. Danielle and I met him at Applebee's. We hung out and talked. I'm extremely impressed with the way things went. I spoke to him about some things that I completely expected him to lose his head over but he was actually very calm. He promised me that if things changed he would not take advantage of the situation and treat her the way she had treated him. I very much respect that decision. I just don't want [him] to be some sort of revenge. I think it is incredibly wrong for that to happen. [He's] a child and a human and should be treated as such. I just want to know that [he] is going to be in a safe and nurturing environment. I'm pretty convinced that the safest place for [him] to be now is with his father. I really wish that I would have done something about the situation earlier. I know that I will have to handle the repercussions of my decision but it is a small price to pay to ensure [his] safety. I will probably elaborate on the subject later.

Although other than all of that today was pretty routine. Woke up at seven. Hung out. Called Kimmie. Played around on the internet. Let the dogs outside. Ate. Moved the laptop into the computer room. Woke Sky up at around nine. Put the dogs away. Logged on to work. Worked and then got up and did all the things mentioned above. Well I am incredibly tired now and want to go to sleep. Oyasumi Nasai!

Little information on some big people in my life

So.... I did not end up meeting with Chris, I still felt sick. Instead hubby decided to stay home and hang out with me rather than go play poker like he typically does on weekends. It was nice. We curled up on the couch and watched Family Guy. So last night was not as interesting as I expected it to be. Right now I'm just hanging out on the couch not wanting to do anything, talking to some of my favorite people in the world. I'm on the phone with one of my dearest friends, Kimmie, and texting my sister.

Just to tell you a little about those two because you will most likely be reading about them quite a bit. I'll start with Kimmie. She is an amazing person that I met almost three years ago. We met at good old IHOP when some of my old friends, who had worked with her, brought her and her friend to IHOP in hopes of wooing them. Wow. That... was a terrible idea. But it worked out for the best in the end. I had a very misconstrued first impression of her, however, I try to be open minded so I didn't rule anything out. Then shortly thereafter we became really close. She married and moved to Germany but we still talk almost daily. She recently had a beautiful daughter whom I love dearly. Kimmie is a wonderful friend, always there for me, always with good advice. I love her very much and am blessed to have her friendship in my life.

Then there is Desiree. Desiree is my older sister. We have always been close but since I started seeing my husband it seemed we got a lot closer. She is seriously one of my best friends. She and I talk almost daily as well. I'm so glad our relationship has progressed to the point where it is now and hope we remain this close. She always gives me great advice. She's definitely someone I look up to. She's smart and funny and I'm very lucky to have not only a fantastic sister but an amazing family in general.

Some other people who will be mentioned as well are Gary and Danielle. Gary is a friend of mine who I attended school with and Danielle is his wonderful wife. You can also find Danielle's blog at www.navybeautyfreak.blogspot.com. Danielle and Gary are awesome people as well. They're still newlyweds and unfortunately have not been able to spend most of their marriage together due to the military. Hopefully soon that will change for at least a while. They will reside in Japan soon enough and will finally have some alone time for a while. Danielle and I have been trying to get some things done, life as a military wife is sometimes very difficult, but in the grand scheme of things totally worth it.

On that note yesterday I was informed that the memorandum required was relayed to Japan therefore by Monday it should have already been reviewed, at least a little. Hopefully that means Monday or Tuesday I'll hear something definitive and hopefully that news is good news. I will be posting when I find out.

Rawr

So here I am working and trying desperately to remain conscious. Its probably stress that has been making me so lethargic and sick. I've been pretty under the weather the past couple days. I just really want to know what is going on. I also really hope that I get the answer I want... and soon! I don't think I can take much more of this. I've been a complete wreck! It certainly doesn't help that most of my friends aren't here, and my really good friend here is practically in the same boat as I am. (Ha! Danielle, no pun intended!)

In all seriousness, I think I'm just done with the states for a while. And this state especially. Too many not so good memories here and the people I have those not so good memories with are right down the street. Don't get me wrong, I'll definitely miss my parents and some of my friends left and all the good memories here, but this place is too hot and the benefits are just better away from the states in general. Not only that but when hubby gets out we probably won't get to go overseas often, if ever. I just really want to take advantage of this opportunity while I have it.

I might meet up with Chris, who is the person from my past who got in touch with me, later today. I might post more after that if we do. I guess its time to focus on some other things for now. Ciao.

Silence! I kill you!

My shepherd is being incredibly annoying right now. She's barking incessantly at god knows what. I do not see why she feels the need to run from couch to couch while she's on her whole barking trip because eventually she ends up right beside me and barks directly in my ear. Not fun.

On a happier note; while I'm still waiting for my clearance to be looked over again at least it feels like we're finally making progress and that people are actually trying to keep me in the loop now. I think I my have been a tad too persistent but I can't help it. I really want to know if I'm going or not. I love Japan. Everything about it! The food, the culture, the language... everything! Its such a gorgeous place and I really want to go back. Oooh!!! And milk tea! I cannot wait to have milk tea again! I really hope I get to go.

I mean, there are some downsides, like my dogs not being able to go with us. Being so far away from most people for such a long period of time. Not being able to take our brand new truck. Aside from that its pretty much the greatest opportunity we could hope for. I have a few friends that will be there and I'll most likely be able to go to school full time. I can submerge myself in the culture again and hopefully actually learn the language this time. I'd really like to be fluent. That would be fantastic!

Oh god I really hope I get to go!!! I'll be crushed... again... But we'll see. Stay tuned.

A new beginning

This is my first blog, I've only ever blogged on myspace so I'm not really sure that counts.

Mostly all I'm doing right now is waiting... Waiting is probably one of my least favorite things to do. Its emotionally exhausting. I really wished all of these big things happened faster. Waiting is really the hardest part. At least if you find out bad news you know and you can decide what to do from there. With waiting for results it almost seems like everything else needs to take a hiatus as well. Its just tiring and scary. Blah... but that's that.

Recently someone from my past got in touch with me. It certainly took me by surprise considering our history together. He seems like he's relaxed a bit and is very interested in making amends. That's a large corner to take, especially with the way I thought he was. I just really want what's best for the "small" party involved. The one who has a piece of my heart. I'm not really sure what to do. I really am not sure whether [he's] in the right place or not.

*Sigh* Well I guess that's all for now. I'm going to be watching some crazy anime. I apologize or being so vague, sometime soon I will elaborate.